As moms, we all feel like we could be doing more. But is it right to listen to that voice that says we aren’t doing enough?
Here’s some advice from a homeschool mom for when you’re wondering if you’re doing enough for your child!
Are You Doing Enough As A Homeschool Mom?
Once you become a mom, the pressure is on. Pressure to have the right birth plan, pressure to feed your baby the proper way, pressure to put your toddler on a good schedule, pressure to make sure your kid is doing well in school, staying active, and making good friends.
If you become a homeschool mom, the pressures are still there, but just different. It can come from outside sources- the relative who thinks you should just put the kids in school, the neighbor kid who scored high on their SATs, the activities that seemingly call you to say yes to every single one of them.
Or, the pressure can come from within. Am I doing it right? Are they learning enough?
Are we spending enough time on academics? Enough time outside? Enough extracurricular activities? Do they have enough friends?
Are we doing enough fun activities? Are we playing together and enjoying childhood? Are we being rigorous enough? Are they scoring high enough on standardized tests? Am I a good enough teacher?
The questions go on and on!
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As a teacher of eleven years and homeschooling mom of five years, let me tell you a little secret:
It’s likely that you’ll never feel like you’re doing enough.
Self-doubt will never be far away. Your fears will rear their ugly heads at the most unpleasant times.
You’ll always wonder if you’re doing it right.
Every day, we are being pummeled by inspiring ideas and an overwhelming amount of quality curricula. Every day, we see all the things we are not doing.
There will always be someone who seems like they have it more together, like their kid is more accomplished, or like they have found the magic formula of what is enough in their homeschool.
But remember, we ALL have areas where we aren’t “together”… some people are just better at faking it than others.
Look at what you are doing.
Every time you feel inadequate, every time you ask that question again: “Am I doing enough,” I want you to do this:
Make a big fat list of everything you are doing. Count everything.
- Making sure every kid is fed.
- Making beds and doing laundry.
- Getting to most subject areas throughout the week.
- Baking together a few days ago.
- Going for a walk on a sunny day.
- Having conversation over dinner.
- Reading together at night.
Don’t worry if it all happened in one day, or if it all happened perfectly. Don’t apologize for things left unfinished or activities undone.
Just acknowledge the things that went right and celebrate them. It’s likely that you’re already doing more than you think you are!
Prioritize connection and relationship.
You know what’s more important than checking off all your homeschooling “to-do’s?” You know what’s more important than having a beautiful Instagram feed full of the creative activities you did as a family?
Building solid, consistent, loving relationships with your children.
My own experience has taught me that fostering connection and relationship in your home is more powerful than whatever activity you feel like you’re not doing enough of.
Instead of worrying about not doing enough, try one of the following instead:
- Make eye contact with your child.
- Listen to your child ramble on about their interests.
- Put down your phone and play together for 15 minutes.
- Practice patience through a difficult school lesson.
- Surprise your child with a hand-drawn picture.
- Smile or give a hug for no apparent reason.
More than enough
It’s not that we shouldn’t try to proactively invest time in our children’s education. Of course, learning together is important!
However, we should know that even on days we don’t get “enough” done, the effort we’ve put into our relationship will energize the culture of the home. It will put “I love you” into action, and build a long lasting connection that will serve our children for years to come.
So take this advice from a homeschooling mom: whenever you think you’re not doing enough, remember to count what you are doing, and remember that relationship building trumps any number of curricula or crafts.
You’ve got this, mama. You are doing more than enough.
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About the Author:
Abigail Zieger is a former education major turned homeschooling mom of four kids. She blogs at Woven Homeschool about finding the beauty in the everyday mess of homeschooling.